You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects something you love or hate about yourself. When we have an emotional reaction as we relate to others it truly is about ourselves and not about anyone else. How we think shows through in how we act and react. Attitudes are mirrors of the mind – they are reflections of our thinking. So the people we are in relationships with are always a mirror, reflecting back to us our own beliefs, and simultaneously we are mirrors reflecting back to them their beliefs.
So the greatest opportunity to explore and know our own strengths and weaknesses is in how we respond to what others are reflecting back to us. If we receive back things that cause emotional discomfort – fear, sadness, anger, disempowerment, etc. – then is it clear that in some area of our thinking there is need for healing. In order to be the most effective mirror for others we must first look to heal our own inner world so it reflects back to the outer world most brightly. As long as there are interactions that cause us to respond with upsetting emotions, then there is inner work to be done.
I remember that my meditation instructor often reminded us that if we could “read” something in another person’s energy field, it was because it existed in our own. So with every reading came the opportunity to see reflected back to us what was truly a pattern that we held in our energy field as well. Great food for thought and action.
It isn’t that we will never be faced with receiving some unhealed “stuff” from others, as I know we each will. It becomes personally meaningful when others unhealed “stuff” sets off a reaction within ourselves – a reaction that is difficult or uncomfortable. There are many times that we are met with others less than perfect behaviors that have no affect on us, like water off a ducks back, and then there are the behaviors that cause a reaction. It is these reactions that require us to pause and reflect as to the meaning it has not about others, but about ourselves.
When I was dating my now husband there was an occasion where his deceased father (who I had never met) appeared to me and showed me that I was to be a mirror for his son. One that would reflect back to him the glory and magnificence of his own light. It is a tall order to be that kind of mirror for one you love dearly. It requires a dedication to your own inner healing process so that the quality of the light you reflect back to those that you love the most is always clear and bright.
Part of being human is that we all are mirrors to each other – mirrors that shine a light or reflection back that shows us where we need to make adjustments. It is part of our journey to continually take on the task of “polishing” the smudges, imprints and scratches on our inner mirror so that it will be a a true reflection of our inner core being. When we dedicate ourselves to this part of our journey then we truly may become the beacon of light that reflects back to others their own brilliance as well.