Loving Yourself

As I have traveled through my own life and worked with many clients it has become apparent that loving oneself is so very important and often so very elusive.  A lack of self love and self worth afflicts many of us and hinders our progress.  Often this damage to our self esteem and self image occurs in our developmental years as children.  When we are young we accept others opinions and assessments of ourselves as fact.  This may create wounds that are often hidden and never heal until  life presents us with opportunities to dig deep and seek healing at a very fundamental level.  This is a process that takes courage, time and focused attention to heal old wounds that allow a new, more accurate understanding of who we are and to know our true worth.

Years ago I was very actively engaged in my own healing journey and part of this process involved a deep meditation practice.  From this deep introspection and the wisdom that comes from quietude, I had a growing awareness that I had never really felt the emotion of love for myself.  It seemed strange to allow this thought to surface into my awareness.  Surely I had felt love for my children, spouse, friends, pets, etc., but I could not remember a time when I had felt the same emotion for myself.  Once this awareness was visible it needed to be addressed and resolved.  I had an old tube of lipstick and on the mirrored closet doors in my bedroom wrote the words "I love myself" in very large letters.  I knew that I would see this affirmation every day and asked that anything needing healing and resolution would come to the surface so I could properly address the emotions, perceptions, etc. that blocked my sense of self love.

Those words remained on my closet doors for a year, during which I had the courage to look into my past and examine the long held opinions and judgments (some I didn't even know were there) that blocked my feeling love for myself.  It was a process that involved forgiving myself and others.  When we have the courage to turn the hologram of our lives around and around to see experiences from every possible perspective, new wisdom about our lives becomes available.  We come to realize that some of what we thought we knew wasn't really true and that if we seek the highest possible perspective we come to know soul wisdom about our life journey and who we really are - and that changes everything.

Over time I have come to love and appreciate myself as a valuable part of the wholeness of creation.  The life lessons along the way have enriched me and made me stronger, wiser, more peaceful, caring and open to myself and others.  It is in healing our heart to allow compassion for ourselves that allows us to love others more fully.  It is only when we truly love and accept ourselves that we are able to truly love.

It is important to note that the ego can get in our way with its constant chatter and busy-ness - it usually wants to remind us of our failures and of others opinions of us.  But as long as you allow others opinions to be your way of measuring yourself you will always be undervalued.  It also wants us to be so busy that we have no awareness of what lays hidden beneath the surface.  So it is necessary to turn off the ego chatter, stop the busy-ness and dig deeper to find our self worth.  Please also know that false ego pride is not self love - and in fact it is only a cover to hide self loathing.

To genuinely love, value and respect ourselves is the foundation of all positive relationships.  It all starts with loving yourself...which enlarges your capacity to have love and compassion for others.  It opens your heart and lets your light shine brightly.  It is healing work worth doing for yourself and across the web of life all creation benefits.  By accepting and loving yourself fully, being what you are, who you are, your simple presence can make a difference for others.

In peace.........Margie